What you’ve written here feels deeply honest because it names a danger that often hides inside good intentions. The pull to become “needed” spiritually is subtle precisely because it can feel like love, purpose, or impact, and yet, as you said, the shift from “walk with me toward Him” to “you are how I get there” changes the entire relationship.
The Apostle Paul says, “Follow me as I follow Christ,” which means guidance has a place, but it is always directional, never ultimate. The moment a person becomes the source rather than a witness to the Source, something begins to distort.
What I appreciate most is that you didn’t resolve this by erasing human participation altogether. That’s an important correction. God works through people, through community, through teachers and shepherds, but never in a way that replaces His living presence, and I think your phrase, “what is good here is received, not owned,” gets to the heart of it.
The gifts are real, the insight may be real, the care may be real, but none of it originates in us. Biblically, that posture matters because it protects both the guide and the one being guided from idolatry disguised as discipleship. In the end, the healthiest spiritual voices are often the ones most committed to being transparent enough that people leave more aware of God than impressed by the speaker.
Thank you for this. There’s a clarity and steadiness in the way you said it that I really appreciate.
What you named about the pull to become “needed” being hidden inside good intentions…that felt especially true to my own experience. It rarely announces itself as anything harmful—it feels like care, like purpose, like responsibility. And yet, as you said, something subtle begins to shift underneath it.
I’m grateful you brought in Paul’s “Follow me as I follow Christ.” That directional piece matters. It keeps the relationship moving beyond the person without dismissing the role of the person. I think that’s where I’ve had to learn—how to remain fully present without quietly becoming a point of arrival.
Your line here stayed with me:
“The moment a person becomes the source rather than a witness to the Source…”
That’s the distortion, exactly. And it’s quiet.
I also appreciate you recognizing that tension of not erasing human participation. That’s been part of the wrestle for me—how to hold what is real (the gift, the insight, the care) without claiming ownership of what was never mine to begin with.
What you said about transparency is powerful…that people would leave more aware of God than impressed by the person. That feels like the right orientation.
Thank you for the way you’re articulating these things. There’s a humility in it that invites reflection rather than correction.
I’m really grateful it met you where you needed it. That’s always my hope with anything I share—that it isn’t just something to read, but something that resonates in a real place.
And truthfully…whatever is good in it isn’t mine to hold onto. It’s something I’m learning as I go, just like everyone else.
Kevin,
What you’ve written here feels deeply honest because it names a danger that often hides inside good intentions. The pull to become “needed” spiritually is subtle precisely because it can feel like love, purpose, or impact, and yet, as you said, the shift from “walk with me toward Him” to “you are how I get there” changes the entire relationship.
The Apostle Paul says, “Follow me as I follow Christ,” which means guidance has a place, but it is always directional, never ultimate. The moment a person becomes the source rather than a witness to the Source, something begins to distort.
What I appreciate most is that you didn’t resolve this by erasing human participation altogether. That’s an important correction. God works through people, through community, through teachers and shepherds, but never in a way that replaces His living presence, and I think your phrase, “what is good here is received, not owned,” gets to the heart of it.
The gifts are real, the insight may be real, the care may be real, but none of it originates in us. Biblically, that posture matters because it protects both the guide and the one being guided from idolatry disguised as discipleship. In the end, the healthiest spiritual voices are often the ones most committed to being transparent enough that people leave more aware of God than impressed by the speaker.
Blessings,
Ze Selassie
Ze—
Thank you for this. There’s a clarity and steadiness in the way you said it that I really appreciate.
What you named about the pull to become “needed” being hidden inside good intentions…that felt especially true to my own experience. It rarely announces itself as anything harmful—it feels like care, like purpose, like responsibility. And yet, as you said, something subtle begins to shift underneath it.
I’m grateful you brought in Paul’s “Follow me as I follow Christ.” That directional piece matters. It keeps the relationship moving beyond the person without dismissing the role of the person. I think that’s where I’ve had to learn—how to remain fully present without quietly becoming a point of arrival.
Your line here stayed with me:
“The moment a person becomes the source rather than a witness to the Source…”
That’s the distortion, exactly. And it’s quiet.
I also appreciate you recognizing that tension of not erasing human participation. That’s been part of the wrestle for me—how to hold what is real (the gift, the insight, the care) without claiming ownership of what was never mine to begin with.
What you said about transparency is powerful…that people would leave more aware of God than impressed by the person. That feels like the right orientation.
Thank you for the way you’re articulating these things. There’s a humility in it that invites reflection rather than correction.
Grateful for your voice in this.
—Kevin
Praise God!
What a brilliant writer you are...I needed to read this..thank you
Hina—
Thank you…that means more than you know.
I’m really grateful it met you where you needed it. That’s always my hope with anything I share—that it isn’t just something to read, but something that resonates in a real place.
And truthfully…whatever is good in it isn’t mine to hold onto. It’s something I’m learning as I go, just like everyone else.
Grateful you took the time to read it.
—Kevin